Writing for Ourselves vs. Writing for Others: The Transformative Power of the Written Word

Writing can be a deeply personal and transformative process; it certainly has been for me. Whether you’re crafting a journal entry for your eyes only or publishing a book for the world to see, the act of writing serves different purposes and offers various therapeutic benefits.

In this post, I will explore the difference between writing for ourselves, which can be much more than just journaling, and writing for others, as well as how each approach can support y/our mental and emotional development.

Writing for Ourselves: I use the term "ourselves" purposefully because I don’t believe there is a single self we are writing to. We are always transforming who we are and who we are striving to become.

Writing for ourselves can take many forms. Whether creating lists, writing letters, building a poem, developing a narrative, or letting your thoughts flow freely, what matters is that this activity is done in private, though all writing represents some form of dialogue.

As I grow older, more and more memories come to me that suggest I have been writing for far longer than I once thought. It was around the age of ten that I discovered poetry, which became a significant part of my mental health practice.

Can you recall a time in your life when you felt more creative and imaginative than you do now?

The Therapeutic Benefits of Writing for Ourselves

1. Introspection & Self-Development:

Writing for ourselves involves a willingness to self-reflect and engage in self-exploration, something many of us may find lacking in our current cultural communities. Writing gives us a space to sit with our experiences, which is the first step towards transformation.

Writing for ourselves provides the freedom to delve deeper into our intimate thoughts, emotions, and experiences without the constraints of others’ scrutiny. Writing in this way can take any form, though my clients often struggle with where to start.

As I like to say, start anywhere!

Stream of consciousness or letting your thoughts flow freely onto the page is a great place to begin and a fantastic way to release negative or anxious thoughts. As my friend, poet, and educator Matt Pasca says: "Better they live on the page than in your head."

Journaling in this way allows you to track your emotional journey over time and gain insights into your personal development. Entries can be as structured or unstructured as you like.

Remember, it’s for your eyes only. There’s no need to worry about being right or wrong.

2. Emotional Release & Relief:

Writing can be a cathartic release for emotions we might be struggling with in private. By putting feelings into words, we create a space for processing and releasing tension in our bodies and spirits.

Clients who struggle with anger, frustration, or obsessive thoughts often find relief in releasing these thoughts onto the page, rather than allowing them to live on in their muscles and bones. This is especially beneficial during times of high stress or life transitions.

Writing things down can help us make sense of jumbled thoughts or complex emotions, leading to clarity and calm. It can even help us make clearer decisions when faced with difficult choices.

3. Creative Liberation:

When we write for our eyes only, there’s no need to concern ourselves with expectations or adherence to conventional standards of writing. Grammar? Spelling? Syntax? They don’t matter.

Creating lists—such as intentions, affirmations, wonderings, or even to-dos—can give us a sense of autonomy in the face of an uncertain world.

You can get playful. Experiment with style, structure, and content. Write a letter, a poem, a song, or even a speech. It doesn’t have to be good. In fact, I often encourage my clients to write the worst thing they can imagine. Give yourself the freedom to make mistakes, to say the things you’re afraid to say, to stop making sense, to be silly, to be unhinged.

No one is looking.

I often wonder how much of who we are and wish to become is edited out of existence before we even try. In writing, you cannot create and edit at the same time! (There’s neuroscience to support this).

This freedom to write unabashedly and unfettered can lead to more authentic and uninhibited forms of expression, which can be both liberating and empowering. In this way, we become reacquainted with our innate curiosity.

And that’s the first step to sharing our curiosity with others.

Steven T. Licardi

Read part 2 "The Therapeutic Benefit of Writing for Others"